Amazon Lumberyard Acceptable Use Policies (lulz)

Discussion in 'Tech Heads' started by Utumno, May 10, 2019.

  1. Utumno

    Utumno Administrator Staff Member

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    40,995
    Fuckin lol:

    57.10. Acceptable Use; Safety-Critical Systems. Your use of the Lumberyard Materials must comply with the AWS Acceptable Use Policy. The Lumberyard Materials are not intended for use with life-critical or safety-critical systems, such as use in operation of medical equipment, automated transportation systems, autonomous vehicles, aircraft or air traffic control, nuclear facilities, manned spacecraft, or military use in connection with live combat. However, this restriction will not apply in the event of the occurrence (certified by the United States Centers for Disease Control or successor body) of a widespread viral infection transmitted via bites or contact with bodily fluids that causes human corpses to reanimate and seek to consume living human flesh, blood, brain or nerve tissue and is likely to result in the fall of organized civilization.

    (yes, it really says that)
    https://aws.amazon.com/service-terms/#57._Amazon_Lumberyard_Engine
     
  2. xanontz

    xanontz Juggalo Gang Member

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    I know you think this is a joke as it's a fun easter egg thing to put bizarre stuff in EULAs and the likes, but as an Amazon employee I can absolutely assure you that was seriously brought up and legitimately considered a good idea by some idiot at a high level and idiots below kissing ass and praising said idiot for really thinking big.
     
  3. Jackpanel

    Jackpanel TZT Abuser

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    I worked in a fur coat store/storage place years ago, where old ladies would bring their fur coats in the summer for cleaning and storage. The ticket they would get when checking in a coat would have a long list of terms in the back, with a very carefully constructed list of calamities where damages to the coat were explicitly not covered, including stuff like earthquakes, tsunamis (400 miles to nearest coast), invasion by foreign armies, nuclear war, etc. It was really clear that someone spent a lot of time compiling the list, making sure not to miss anything. Since it wasn’t included in the list though, I assume that zombie damage was fully warrantied.
     
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  4. Jackpanel

    Jackpanel TZT Abuser

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    On a related note, you’ll never find a more comfortable place to sleep than a pile of 20 minks coats on a warehouse floor.
     
  5. xanontz

    xanontz Juggalo Gang Member

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    7,656
    Yea, but have you ever slept on a pile of 20 actual minks? They're toothy little fuckers but damn are they soft while even still alive