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Topics - Vlaara the Brown

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Spamalot / posting is an art
« on: November 23, 2014, 09:01:22 PM »
title: Embracing Your Inner God
medium: post

I have been thinking about the nature of posting, particularly posting as a medium. Tallon Zek is my audience, posting is my medium.

A triumph of style, really.

Spamalot / You gentlemen know I am going to claim the title
« on: November 23, 2014, 03:06:20 PM »
Of most threads created eventually. I am a randian posting hero.

General Disconation / When a boy writes off the world
« on: November 23, 2014, 02:42:18 PM »
it's done in sloppy misspelled words.

Non-Prophets - The Cure

multimedia art, done in the posting style.

Sometimes I feel like I'm searching for a cure. Can you hear me love?

Do you guys feel like death and killing is masculine? I don't mean that in the dumb sense of killing is manly. I mean that is death masculine? birth feels feminine for obvious reasons.

Melancholy beginnings to this fine Sunday. I introduced my brother to this music, he loved it.

Did you know two of my other brothers played EverQuest? Idaru of course many of you know, and Nevur Faded a bard.

Spamalot / Part 1
« on: November 22, 2014, 01:36:21 PM »
This is the part where we ask

To What End

The peculiar capitalization is only to indicate just how important the question is.

To what end? This is the question before us.

To What End?

I don't actually have a good answer to this one, to stabilize the universe? To ensure this Question floats across computer screens for eternity?

Is an end different than a purpose?

Purpose is a funny thing, you see its a human construct. Like all human constructs though it has power.

All human constructs have potential and power. They are however predicated on our existence. So to some degree God and the Constitution (or perhaps we should speak of the great mediocre beast it created) they are all as dependent on food and water as we are. So again, I ask To What End?

Will you give me some hippy bullshit about making life better for everyone? I got news for you, I care about TZT only because I know you cocksuckers not because I have some great love for individual  humanity. Which I already feel the need to clarify because I love humans dearly, how could I not?

I don't even know if I get a choice, I am alive and that feels to me like a choice. Isn't it weird that I think about death so much, I have seen and experienced so much of in my life but why does it just now feel like a choice? Am I really alive now? Digressions seem to be a specialty of ours but perhaps for the first part I should endeavor to explain the end, unless one of you hail and hearty fellows has a different end in mind. 

Do not fret pals, the beginnings are merely a time to ensure that the plan moving forward is without as much flaw as possible. Can a philosophy maintain its integrity from culture to culture? I believe it can, I have to otherwise I am not Yup'ik. I lack the most important characteristic of a Yup'ik, I cannot speak the language.

General Disconation / alluding to allusions
« on: November 19, 2014, 02:06:54 PM »
Is Russell Brand doing it? How about The Ill Mind of Hopsin?

Will electing Elizabeth Warren do what we hoped Obama has not?

I don't think a black man could do it, at least not now. It is of course not that black people are incapable, it is America herself that is fighting this current. I was reading this great book of quotes and one talked about just letting go and floating in that current.

Do you know what current I speak of?

It is just off the coast,  we are pretty sure we know where it goes. We are going.

Of course I am also alluding of the ever present molotov. I only say ever present because for some of you I know it is always an option and that is good. It is always an option.

Do not throw them in the current! This conversation is a "yes, and" as opposed to the "yes, but". (watch this if you don't know what I refer to)

The problem is every time I sit down to write this post I stop, I'll probably hit enter this time. The question before us is not how we foment revolution, that is the easy part.

The most effective molotovs are ideas. The real question is if we succeed what is it exactly do we want? (please be assured, molotovs will be thrown because I am not sure we can stop it)

I know what I want, or at least an approximation.

So I'm going to butcher this story but its a good one and I hope that this does a better job of kicking off some ideas within TZT, if I am going to waste my time here (and it looks like I am) then I should perhaps enlist y'all. As Tobin says The Gifts of the Almighty are weighed and parceled out in a scale peculiar to himself. That being the case, I have a fair amount of the kinds of gifts that God bestows upon men. I am a charming motherfucker and I happen to have lots of life experience, I am well educated, my brain work good and I am apparently crazy enough that I can't get these thoughts out of my head. But I cannot go it alone, I don't have all the gifts.

A world is supported by four things ... the learning of the wise, the justice of the great, the prayers of the righteous and the valor of the brave. But all of these are as nothing ... without a ruler who knows the art of ruling. Make that the science of your tradition! O h reverend mother!

I can
re out the

of it

The science of my tradition, there is a science to it. You think we lived here without learning the lessons of God ? We know them too well.

Does the prophet see the future or does he see a line of weakness, a fault or cleavage that he may shatter with words or decisions as a diamond-cutter shatters his gem with a blow of a knife? My Princess I know precisely what you mean.

Minor prophets can see the future, we can all engage in minor prophecy. Given enough information we can tell you what is likely to happen. I am no minor prophet pals,

the Major Prophet what does he see? A possibility. The Major Prophet wills.

So the Story:

Among the people of the Pacific Islands were navigators. Men who could read the weather, read the ocean and read the currents. Many of them died out with colonization and the aftereffect, navigation became somewhat of a lost art. They resurrected these traditions. An elder from Tahiti was teaching this art, to a young man. He taught him everything, and they planned a long trip to Tahiti from Hawai'i. Tahiti being an island this untested navigator had never seen.

The navigator is an important position on the open ocean, this is the man who decides the directions, what currents to follow and where. If the navigator fails, then all is lost. Many boats have been lost to history this way, all across the world.

The teacher asks the apprentice to go over the route. Asks him to explain how to get to Tahiti. The apprentice obliges, displaying his mastery of reading the skies, and reading the water. Tells him in great detail how he is going to reach his destination. At the end of his story the master tells him "OK good, can you see the island?"

The apprentice knew this was an important question, but he did not know why. He did not want to disappoint his teacher but he also did not want to lie.

"No I cannot"

At this answer the master replied it was good enough for that day. For a time after this the master started asking him to recite his star chart or whatever its called, and explain to him again how to get there. He of course obliged, but knew the question was coming and knew he still didn't have the answer to it.

"but do you see the island?"

He did not, he began to question whether his teacher believed he was capable of leading his crew on this journey. He began to question himself, he became unsure of his knowledge and began questioning whether he was good enough to lead them on this voyage. Still he kept on, and kept showing up and his teacher would periodically make him go over the route and ask the same question. But it was eating away at him.

One day going over the route with his master, he could see the island in his minds eye. He could see the destination, he told his master as much.

The master said

"This is good, on your journey it will not go perfectly. Some nights you cannot see the stars, you may encounter storms and weather. You will be blown off course, you will lose hope. If you forget your destination all is lost, always hold it in your heart and know that you will reach it."

I can see the island that is my destination, I hold it in my heart. Remember the great ship I alluded to in my poem on leadership? Of course that is us, humanity the great ship.

To captain this ship will tear you apart, if you attempt to turn the rudder your handle will be smashed to bits and your bones will be crushed. It can be piloted, sometimes the course corrections happen after you die.

Anyhow too much typing, I'm just gonna eat some breakfast. I did butcher that story a bit but I hope the gist reached you, I am still working out the poetry of all this.

Spamalot / I have a confession
« on: November 14, 2014, 04:26:52 PM »
I'm a little bit in love, in a really sad way with white people. Particularly the old white ones, the Republicans and such. I don't think that I hate any of them, which isn't to say that I would not wage war against them. Man I can't hate them, I just don't. I also don't hate Democrats, but since its their company I keep I probably actually hate them a little bit more than the Republicans. I feel like I have a good understanding of where most Republicans stand, and you get comfortable with the hostility but it does not permit you to be friends in a sense.

This fucking playlist lmao

Radiohead - Creep

Got me thinking about wars, and fighting and the young kids who are just kids who listened to dumb music like this. I almost wish America fought wars just for some deluded sense of justice. I think we could reconcile that if we had the latitude. I bet some of you would go fight in a war if we had good reasons. There are good reasons to fight, but there are also much better ways of going about getting your way if it can be helped.

I would go still, if it I really believed it meant a better future. Anyhow so all this nervous energy of white folks, I had some inklings earlier. I know one of them was the idea that the bureaucracy is probably a lot more stable than our political system. Even as our government goes through these fluctuations the bureaucracy is composed of less politically motivated people, yes certainly the heads of these organizations can change and like the idiot being assigned to the environment committee  but the people doing environment science, and gathering all this data will not be replaced by an army of idiot Republicans. I think Jong said some neat shit in the other thread about how important the china/us thing was, we are making progress I think.

hell i ain't even that worried about the presidential election in 2016 or any of the rest of them for that matter. i hope a democrat wins and perhaps we can keep this ship running while it makes a course correction. besides all that you god damn fools even if a Republican wins in 2016 do you think we would get the revolution we want if Democrats were in charge? lol.

Nah, we got this. We will ride them like WORMS

Dune (8/9) Movie CLIP - Riding the Sandworm (1984) HD

General Disconation / to post in here
« on: November 12, 2014, 02:10:41 PM »
well this one is the easiest of all to post in, however beware of casting pearls before swine. you toss these pigs pellets of corn. pearls belong in other places.

Spamalot / how to post?
« on: November 12, 2014, 02:06:52 PM »

Spamalot / Mostly to Jong
« on: November 12, 2014, 11:52:33 AM »
I really enjoyed listening to this again. Was listening to it yesterday and crying but in a good wayish. My bro was really into music, played guitar and sang karaoke with passion (I made fun of him for the latter). I was just thinking if it was me who done did it, or one of my other brothers I know music would be one way he would process it.

fucking retard.

Mm.. Food

Spamalot / google Winter music
« on: November 11, 2014, 06:25:45 PM »
and got pretty much what I expected

The fox in the snow - Belle and Sebastian

Spamalot / the title in my GD thread
« on: November 11, 2014, 05:05:14 PM »
Looks like "I'm leaving the board" which is pretty clickbaity if you ask me. It wasn't on purpose.

Fuck I'm trying to write this story I'll actually get paid for and I just wanna play some EverQuest. Oh well

Spamalot / of all the dumb assholes
« on: November 11, 2014, 02:26:50 PM »
you are currently the dumbest Qubhed. But we love you anyhow assuming you didn't follow through and shoot yourself in the head. If you did btw, you are a dumb asshole and I mean that. Because someone has to clean up that mess and in the case of my brother it was me. Two friends (who both actually played EverQuest, Nishi and Acreal) helped me scrub my brothers brains from the ceiling and walls and I still have a bag of skull chunks because I could not in my grief bear to throw those away. Anyways, I hope you shoot yourself in the head while throwing yourself in a river or something so at least no one has to clean up the mess and even if its not a family member i can tell you its not a job anyone wants to do. inconsiderate fuck

anyways i hope you enjoyed the louis ck skit, because thats you chubby. louis ck isn't a good looking man by any standard, but we love him. god damn ginger bearded, pink human being. he
s not even white, he's pink. he's dumpy, but god damn he's smart and funny and i guarantee you louis ck has turned down more pussy than probably your entire family for the last thirty generations has even seen.

nigga doesn't get some pussy and gets all crazy when he has a weeks vacation. you are a moron

General Disconation / I'm leaving the board of an anti-racist organization
« on: November 11, 2014, 12:25:18 PM »
It's not that I don't care, I'm just tired. I do believe this next generation is already light years ahead of their predecessors but man that belief takes a hit any time I'm in an area with rural whites. I guess as long as we stay out of small towns on the road system people of color should be fine. I to this day pack heat when I'm going anywhere that has an excess of low education white folks.

And its not like I blame them, I understand they are just human. I see a lot of the same ideas and fears among my own. I'm terrible though, I mean I barely like white people. I try and go into every new meeting with an open mind but I am disappointed often enough that I don't even wanna give most folks a chance. I don't want any new friends unless they are hot and female. Fuck even as I say that, no matter how hot they are I can't stand racist white chicks either. Its not even limited to them, "uncle tom's" or I think more accurately the house negroes drive me nuts. my own people who with a straight face place 100% of the blame on us for our situation. I do believe we are the only ones who can get us out of this mess colonialism has left but we aren't the ones making the policy decisions that affect our lives.

anyhow, im done. im more of a separatist in the sense i would rather have separate schools, separate economy, separate everything but co-exist under our own separate systems.

that's not a pipe dream, this is something we can accomplish. it wouldn't be like you think though, white folks would still be welcome in all our communities and go to our schools etc. but these institutions would be based on our worldview, which is most simply described as some kind of collectivist philosophy which is of course, the most correct one.

but in the meantime, not sure i belong in an organization that promotes the healing of racism when I have this attitude. I won't even explain anything to white folks anymore, i just don't give a shit what they think past what they'll kill me for.

what say ye denizens of norrath?

Spamalot / No post before this one
« on: November 10, 2014, 04:09:08 PM »
Or any after matters more than this one.

I claim it now, and even if you claim any different in other posts it will have been in reaction to this post, not borne of itself as this post is. So sitting haughtily upon my pixel throne I tell ye.

I tell ye nothing you 360 degree cunts. Which, as many of you know means y'all are cunts any which way you look at it.

Spamalot / Dear Knitting
« on: November 09, 2014, 02:11:30 PM »
Did you get any sleep yet?

General Disconation / lol ur welcome
« on: November 08, 2014, 03:47:22 PM »
Sounds like this typhoon thats about to hit our western coast is going to shoot all our cold weather to you guys in the lower 48

General Disconation / South Korea, racist Korea?
« on: November 06, 2014, 10:41:19 AM »

also, that video on fb made me lol so hard.

General Disconation / Election Day article for Alaska
« on: November 04, 2014, 02:50:40 AM »

If I was a betting man, I would stay away from the senate race in Alaska. Wouldn’t much care for my chances either way. You just don’t bet against the odds. When I peeked at the numbers for the upcoming senate race it looks as though it is a Republican majority with or without Sullivan.

Over at the Nate Silver’s FiveThirtyEight blog (which, if you haven’t heard, predicted Obama’s win in 2012 as well as a slew of other predictions in a way that the no other mainstream outfit could match in accuracy), they are calling it for a Senate majority for Republicans, with 74 percent confidence. This is good news for Republicans, and honestly I think it is a good thing for Democrats too. Gridlock might be a good thing while we sort out the mess we are in politically. It doesn’t actually matter which side is correct: if either side is as corrupt as everyone claims it is, then the whole country is in trouble regardless of who is in power. I am a Democrat myself, but I would prefer we as Democrats not have to pass legislation scorched-earth style – that’s not how anyone should govern.

It doesn’t really matter nationally whether Republicans win Alaska, gridlock will be gridlock. Even if Dan Sullivan wins, sure he could do some damage to our state, but mostly because no matter what he says he isn’t from Alaska and it shows in his understanding of the issues. If you lose, try again in ten years, Marine – I’ll probably even vote for you. But I think my man Mark is going to pull through. Alaska is tough to call, as FiveThirtyEight admits: “If there’s a race that keeps us awake at night, it’s Alaska.”

Mark winning wouldn’t even be the end of the world for Republicans. There will be great gnashing of teeth if he does win, but cooler heads should remain so and realize that Alaska’s strategy should not be part of any party’s national strategy. I know I am not alone in despising the sheer amount of advertising because we are part of that plan. My son thinks Obama, Sullivan, and Begich are all bad guys because there is no good advertising, or so little it doesn’t register in the partisan bleating.

Mark is a fine senator, and with him we have one Senator each in both major parties, both moderate, and both accessible.

On the House side, Don Young is the most senior Republican in the House. I really love Forrest Dunbar and I agonized over this, but I won’t be supporting him over Young. I won’t be heartbroken if you win, Forrest, and I wish you the best of luck, but I’m still going with Young. The man has so much seniority he doesn’t need to chair any committees, recognize. When he isn’t showing his ass to God and country, Don Young is a formidable congressman. But I won’t discount how unpopular his suicide comment made him. I know two grown men who he made indirectly cry with that comment and, being one of them, I tell you I don’t much care for crying about this subject any more than I already do.

Begich’s real power comes from his incredible ground game in Alaska, particularly in rural communities. I know so many amazing young Alaska Native leaders out there going door to door every day, and I think that is what is going to push him over the top.

Interestingly enough, the same vote might spell doom for the pot initiative. Countless Native organizations have come out against it. In my experience, Natives are generally very conservative. Most of my entire family and most everyone I know you would think vote Republican (and many do). We are pretty much the Eskimo version of mom and apple pie. Except its mom, gram and your whole family and agutaq. We go to church every Sunday and pray before every meal. We have one of the highest percentage of people who serve in the military anywhere in the country and we vote overwhelmingly for Democrats. So while this is good news for Begich, I question how this is going to affect the pot initiative. The possible counter to that would be the young rural turnout — which helps the pot initiative, but I think might be a wash for Democrats.

No matter how this all turns out I will be pretty nonplussed (take that English). No matter what happens you should also relax. Gridlock can be a good thing, and yes perhaps the country will become worse off, and yes many people will be hurt in the turmoil. But we will still be America, so we’ll probably still be doing pretty good.

The Republicans will inherit an improving economy, and their first target will be Obamacare. But they probably can’t hurt it too much.

They certainly aren’t going to get rid of it no matter how they bluster. Maybe, with enough wisdom, they can fine tune it. I would prefer single-payer for everyone using a Nuka-style system like Southcentral Foundation has, but perhaps we should see how Obamacare plays out. Barry is a smart dude. It’s really not a bad plan if you think about it, it manages to provide many of the benefits of single payer and retain some of the value of the insurance model. So yeah, gridlock is fine for now, and in four years I will vote for Lisa and Don.

If you’re still reading this, maybe you might be one of the ones I want to stay in Alaska. If oil dropped to $15  a barrel tomorrow we would find out in short order who the real Alaskans were. We have economic tourists, and while they may be American, they might not be Alaskan. I’m not pointing this out to be xenophobic, I don’t mind too much. A good job is a good job. After all, the reason my wife and I moved back to Alaska was for a better job for her and opportunity for me.

It wasn’t a hard sell: I was born in Bethel and raised mostly in Nome before spending my adolescence in Palmer. I thought I wanted to leave when I was younger but as it turns out, this is my home. As a friend once said: I will die here. My bones will be laid to rest alongside my family interred in the tundra. I care greatly about what happens here, but my view is so long I have a hard time getting too worried about this short term stuff. The vision at the place I work is “Progress for the next 10,000 years,” and while I am lately becoming suspicious of progress, I find the timeline useful for putting things into context.

So I’m not too worried about this election any which way it goes, but that’s only because I don’t think it could get much worse – and even if it does, it seems that may be necessary. What does Alaska do? Well, first of all perhaps we need to define who is Alaskan: if you won’t be here when the oil and gas runs out, then you are a tourist. We love tourists in Alaska, but we have a special kind of relationship. We might bitch about our winters, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. The tourists aren’t all bad either. For instance, Big Oil does do a lot of good when they aren’t exploiting Parnell’s unapologetically pro-oil agenda. Not only is the work they do crucial to the success of our economy, they also contribute to many great organizations around the state.

We should always recognize relationships for what they are, something that’s lost on Sean Parnell. Big Oil is a big tourist. Palin always calls them like she sees them, her vision ain’t always so good but she pegged Parnell for what he is. Our relationship with oil is a partnership, but oil always has to be the one who loves more. Just for the record, Alaskans can and do work within the oil companies, but don’t think for one minute Alaska is a charity case. That job is not a favor. They are not here to do us a solid.

We’ve got some internal stuff to work out, and I aim to stir that hornets nest if anyone cares to listen. In the meantime, one of the things we can do is stop playing their game. We have a lot going on in our country right now, and for better or worse we are stuck in it together. A lot of people look to Alaska, and for good reason. We are a leader in many ways, and even without the tourists (economic and otherwise) we are a weird lot. Maybe even weird enough to actually make change in our political system.

General Disconation / A note on leadership
« on: November 02, 2014, 02:04:22 PM »
I had a hard time sleeping in Cali, I was exhausted and after two weeks of working with some amazing people it was my brothers birthday. I'm still feeling plagued by darkness like this event let all the others in who had been clamorimg at the gate. I wrote a note and thought I would share, I'm sure you'll see some themes of mine, and I assure you that the God I believe in is greater and more terrible than any imagined before except mine is real, and we are all part of her.

And on dark days I even resent my own people at having to be a leader when all I want is to raise my kids to be good men. I want to sweep dusty wooden floors and live far away from the evils of men and dwell where God intended, among the birds and the beasts. We build, and create and move because while God never intended for men to wonder, we do.

And I tell you that I do not shoulder this weight gladly. Nor will I pretend to enjoy it in order to appease romantic idols. I do not enjoy this, and I groan under the unfairness of it. I shoulder the weight, glance among my peers and we move. We quietly labor while knives dart from eyes and tongues lash about us. Men do not know how much they can endure until they can endure it no longer. The path of leadership is littered with the corpses of dreams and ambitions. Those who are left make the terrible decisions left to us by our ancestors, we twist and turn like dancers following paths only visible to us. The dried out husks of men visible on the horizon, those who dared to forge new trails only to die alone in barren lands.

Our only nourishment is the advancement of our people, but I ask you how do you measure this? Direction is meaningless when you have no destination. Is our labor for naught?

Perhaps the island we seek is nothing but a dream. But men's dreams can be snatched from the ether. We build our island on the corpses of men, great heaps of bone. Tending to our stony hearts hardened by trespass after trespass we scratch about tilling infertile ground. You think to ignore the mandate of God? Better to shatter yourself willingly than to run aground of her will.

This tower of Babylon, this ziggurat composed of will. A tiny sliver of light superimposed upon the monolith God set before us. Daring to be a leader of men, composing a wheelhouse within which to build a handle and attach it to that great rudder that moves us inexorably forward.

We are all the wretched of the earth, even those who lock themselves in great houses of glass and steel realize too late what they fear most lies within themselves. They have not locked out death, rather they have locked him in. Him having entered with the sperm into the egg, scrawling instructions then lying dormant until his time grows near. They realize it too late, the fear is palpable but why fear the embrace of your father?

We are born again and again, the only memory we retain is institutional. Hordes of howling magnificent monkeys, even to be the greatest of these is hardly a feat.

Every laugh is in the face of death, every laugh is in the face of death. A hearty bellow on a dark day.

Spamalot / all music is pleasing to the Gods
« on: October 11, 2014, 12:49:10 PM »
but the kind that gets the pussy juice flowing is the most sacred:

SchoolBoy Q - Studio (Explicit) ft. BJ The Chicago Kid

General Disconation / San Francisco 18th-1st
« on: October 10, 2014, 12:55:17 PM »
Gonna be at Stanford again, coming back as an advisor for the Alaskan cohort of the First Nations Program there. As an advisor I'll have a little more free time, but not much. I also don't drink currently and due to my perceived mental health state I will likely not be drinking anytime soon, but I am down to hang out, and if for some reason I am drinking then I should at the very least be an interesting post.

General Disconation / Why Are There So Few Doctors in Rural America?/
« on: October 08, 2014, 10:12:57 PM »
/What's more, doctors working in the hinterlands face geographic struggles that a Dupont Circle dermatologist can't fathom. In Alaska's villages, community health aides work out of single-room clinics, relying on shaky phone and Internet connections for back-up. Many Native Alaskans speak rare tribal tongues as their first language. Overt complaining is not customary among some of the tribes, making it difficult for doctors to understand their symptoms. Transfers of patients to specialists or emergency rooms depend on the schedules of rickety charter planes, which often get "weathered up," or prevented from flying because of rain, snow, or some combination of the two.

Butler, from the Tribal Health Consortium, was once working out of a clinic on St. Lawrence Island, which floats just below the Bering Strait. One morning, there was a knock at the door and a local resident brought in a 14-year-old with a massive facial wound and cerebrospinal fluid pouring out of his nose. After the boy was stabilized, a blizzard rolled in, and Butler and the health aide spent the next six hours waiting for the weather to clear before a plane could come collect him.



Spamalot / Would marry
« on: October 08, 2014, 06:51:21 PM »
bjork - bachelorette

I'm a fountain of blood
In the shape of a girl
You're the bird on the brim
Hypnotised by the Whirl

Drink me, make me feel real
Wet your beak in the stream
Game we're playing is life
Love is a two way dream

Leave me now, return tonight
Tide will show you the way
If you forget my name
You will go astray
Like a killer whale
Trapped in a bay

I'm a path of cinders
Burning under your feet
You're the one who walks me
I'm your one way street

I'm a whisper in water
Secret for you to hear
You are the one who grows distant
When I beckon you near

Leave me now, return tonight
The tide will show you the way
If you forget my name
You will go astray
Like a killer whale
Trapped in a bay

I'm a tree that grows hearts
One for each that you take
You're the intruder hand
I'm the branch that you break

General Disconation / Japanese help!
« on: October 07, 2014, 09:31:37 PM »
I'm gonna get my kid cartoons in Japanese. I definitely wanna get some of the ones we already have in Japanese, but I am mostly looking for some good kid cartoons (princess mononoke is about the goriest thing they watched i think so nothing worse than that) that are from Japan, and reflect Japanese culture etc. I figure if he's gonna immerse, dem cartoons better be immersed.

Spamalot / Mern (EQ related)
« on: October 07, 2014, 05:03:50 PM »
You ever get your spells researched? I grabbed bond of death, and looking for lich. I might just level to 50+ and use those spells. lol

General Disconation / The End is Near! (paging Ssalam)
« on: October 06, 2014, 12:05:33 PM »

Some of the more unbearable atheists will also enjoy this:

I'm sorry Left Behind fans.

But, there is no such thing as the rapture.

Of course, you couldn't tell me this when I was in high school because I was head over heals in love with biblical prophecy. Nothing else mattered. I was utterly convinced that the book of Revelation was a road map to the future and Jack Van Impe was the prophet who could unlock the apocalyptic map for me. I even had the Jack Van Impe Prophecy Bible, leather bound and color coordinated to let me know exactly what each verse prophesied. So sure was I that the rapture would happen at any moment, that I believed it to be my mission from God to scare let everyone around me know that the end was nigh so they would not be left behind.

I was genuinely shocked every morning when I would wake up to find myself still in my bed and not standing at the pearly gates.

Was my math wrong?

Had I missed a color-coded clue in my prophecy bible?

Surely Jack Van Impe hadn't misread a sign in the news. So why hadn't I been raptured already??

This went on for years, until finally I entered college.

A christian college, of course. Where else would a end times expert go to school?

I was a religion major. So, I decided I would clear this rapture matter up once and for all with one of my religion professors as soon as possible and finally get an precise date for the rapture.

After all, isn't that the whole point of being a New Testament scholar? To be able to predict the rapture?

Not long after I arrived at college I had a meeting with my advisor, a professor in New Testament theology. I thought surely, if anyone understands the signs of the times as well as Jack Van Impe it would be him. So, I confidently marched into his office, instantly recognized that his efforts to work through my class schedule were a not so subtle invitation to discuss the apocalypse, and spent the next 20 minutes or so explaining to him why I knew that the end was nigh and why I was so frustrated that this fact wasn't the only thing we talked about in class or the only thing my pastor preached about every Sunday morning.

Fortunately for me, he was a patient man.

It was almost as if he had heard this speech before from some other young end times expert. While I hated his response at the time, his words forever changed my perspective on biblical prophecy and the rapture.

He said, "Here's my problem with Jack Van Impe and guys like him: They are trying to pinpoint places on prophetic map that simply doesn't exist. Are we living in the last days? Absolutely, but we have been ever since Jesus walked out of the tomb on Easter morning."

He said more, but to be honest I don't remember it because I was floored. How dare he say there is no prophetic roadmap?! Had he not read any of the Left Behind books?? It was all there in black and white!!

When I finally calmed down about a week later, I decided to investigate his nonsensical claim further and attempt to do so with as open a mind as I possible could. It wasn't an easy process. Or a short one. But once I reached the end of my prophetic investigative journey I reached one clear and indisputable conclusion.

I was wrong.

It hurt to admit it and to be honest it kinda still does. But there was no way around it -- the rapture was never, ever going to happen.

You see, I had made the same mistake that Jack Van Impe makes. He shouts (or at least passionately pleas) the loudest and only hears others like him shouting that the end is nigh. So, over time he becomes convinced that the rapture is imminent, that he has it all (or at least a lot of it) figured out, and that everyone who disagrees will be left behind.

Like my prophetic hero, I was screaming the loudest that the rapture was imminent and I only surrounded myself with voices that agreed with me. Because of this, I was never able to hear a crucial piece of information: No one in the church has ever even believed in the rapture until the last 200 years or so.

You see, the idea of a rapture never even appears on the church's radar until the late 18th and early 19th centuries. You would think that such a pivotal moment in the life of the church would get a least a brief mention by someone like Luther or Calvin or Aquinas or maybe Augustine. But there is only silence.


Well the first reason is fairly straightforward.

The term "rapture" appears no where in the Bible. Of course, neither does the word "trinity." But the concept of a triune God does appear throughout the New Testament. While the idea of believers being "caught up in the air" is mentioned, it is metaphorically describing the Second Coming. Paul is not claiming, nor even implying that Christians will disappear before all hell breaks loose on earth.

In fact, (and this is probably the second biggest reason the great thinkers of the church don't talk about the rapture) the very idea of the rapture is antithetical to the narrative of scripture.


Because the Bible is a story about a God who journeys with His people through hard times even when it is God who has unleashed the judgment. He doesn't pluck them out of danger. Whether that danger is slavery in Egypt, wandering in the wilderness, exile in Babylon, the travails of Job, oppression under the Romans, or the persecution of the early church, God walks with God's people through the valley of the shadow of death. He doesn't snatch them out of it.

If that is true, then our love for the rapture reveals a lack of love for the very world Jesus came to save. The very idea of the church abandoning the world in its time of need is endemic of an American Christianity that is more focused on the self than the needs of the other, more gnostic (concerned with right ideas) than actually Christian, and hyper-focused on the hereafter to the detriment of the here and now. Yes, the Second Coming is important -- but so is everything that happens before.

But perhaps the most important thing to remember is the book of Revelation is not a road map to the future. It is the declaration that Jesus will return, justice will be granted to the oppressed, and all things will be made new. But it is not attempting to give precise details on how that will happen.

Rather than an apocalyptic road map, Revelation is a book of worship. It exists to declare the glory, power, and grace of God. It is not a guidebook to the apocalypse.

Now, I absolutely believe that Jesus will return one day to wipe away every tear from our eyes and make all things new.

But that is the Second Coming, not the rapture. Those are two very, very different things. One allows us to neglect the present world and let it crumble away while we focus on our own eternal glory. The other beckons us to participate in God's restoration of creation by loving His people and showing them how to live the life God intended until He does return to bring that work of redemption to final completion.

We are absolutely living in the last days, but as my professor said so long ago, we have been ever since Jesus walked about of the tomb on Easter morning.

So, let us live as if these truly are the last days, not by running around telling the world "Good luck, we'll see you later!"But by incarnating the love of God to a world desperately in need of His grace.

By doing that, we affirm the truth and hope of the resurrection while showing the world that the return of our Lord is not something to be feared.

It's something to celebrate.

Spamalot / Antarctica the Polymorphess
« on: October 01, 2014, 12:00:26 PM »
Ahab - Antarctica The Polymorphess

Spamalot / Dear Buhbuh
« on: October 01, 2014, 11:56:02 AM »
Listen, some of your friends in Norrath have noticed you haven't logged in for a while. While we are happy for you, we also worry. Are you OK pal?

Spamalot / one last poem
« on: September 29, 2014, 04:50:49 AM »

General Disconation / The Sarah Palin Channel
« on: September 28, 2014, 01:33:55 PM »

The Sarah Palin Channel. (

Sarah Palin still exists.

I know. I was beginning to have my doubts, too. Once upon a time, Palin was everywhere. On Fox News. On reality TV. On the cover of Time. And Newsweek. And Time. And Newsweek. And Time, and Newsweek, and Newsweek again.

Now Palin is none of those places. For most of us, she is but a receding image in the rearview mirror of human history — a bit of trivia to be trotted out on a future episode of "Who Remembers the Aughties?" That meticulous chestnut coif. Those glinting, frameless glasses. That chirpy "you betcha" accent. The Mama Grizzly herself.

And yet, as I recently discovered — the hard way — Palin is still with us. By "with" I mean starring in a steady stream of shoestring videos on her own Internet television station. And by "us" I mean "anyone who is willing to send Sarah Palin $9.95 a month or $99.95 a year for the privilege of watching said videos." (Palin's fellow yesteryear conservative Glenn Beck also relies on a subscription-based channel to maintain — and monetize — his political celebrity.)

Curious? Of course you are. (You clicked on this story, didn't you?) The sad truth, however, is that in these tough economic times, many Americans don’t have as much money to spend on Sarah Palin videos as they once did.

So I've decided to help out.

Earlier this month, I subscribed to the Sarah Palin Channel. I entered my credit card info. I said au revoir to my $9.95. And then, in an effort to Understand What the Heck Is Going On With Sarah Palin Circa 2014, I proceeded to binge-watch every single video that America's Hockey Mom-in-Chief has posted since launching her site five weeks ago. All 77 of them.

It was an illuminating experience.


It's worth noting, before we dive in, that the Sarah Palin Channel — produced in partnership with Tapp, the Web TV venture headed by Jeff Gaspin, former chairman of NBCUniversal television, and Jon Klein, former president of CNN U.S. — is more than just videos. There's also a national debt ticker; a clock that counts down the seconds until Barack Obama leaves office; links to Palin's books; links to Bristol Palin's blog; an Image of the Day (an "Obamacare Death Panel" cartoon: "Let's start with jobs"); a Quote of the Day (Ronald Reagan: "The problem is not that people are taxed too little, the problem is that government spends too much"); and, finally, a Word of the Day selected by Palin's mother, Sally Heath ("perfunctory adj. Done routinely and with little interest or care").

But the videos, of course, are where the action is. Each clip features Palin responding to fans, giving viewers a "behind the scenes" look at her life, or holding forth on one subject or another: Labor Day, Mo'ne Davis, Mike Ditka, Richard Dawkins, James Foley, Rick Perry, World War I, Elizabeth Warren, Richard Nixon, "Duck Dynasty," and so on. The production is amateurish: handheld camera, reverberating audio, iMovie edits. The setting rarely strays from Palin's lakefront McMansion in Wasilla. The star relocates from her kitchen to her den to her living room, from her deck to her yard. Her outfits — pink fleece, furry white vest, red blazer, green Oscar the Grouch tee — cycle in and out. Her hair is up, then down, then up again. Sometimes she calls out to her husband, Todd, who responds from another room; sometimes her children can be seen watching Nick Jr. in the background. All in all, Palin seems less like a former GOP vice presidential nominee in the middle of making a television show than like a bored, slightly desperate housewife in the middle of making a vlog.

Lest anyone think that's a bad thing, however, let me be clear: It's not. It is, in fact, the most interesting thing about the Sarah Palin Channel. The more I watched, the more I began to realize that the real drama on display wasn't the clash between, say, Palin's bold frontier conservatism and Obama's so-called crypto-Muslim plot to fundamentally transform America. It was the battle taking place inside of Sarah Palin herself.

Call it the Tale of Two Palins. The first is the Palin that Palin thinks she's supposed to be. The Conservative Leader. The Christian Role Model. The Constitutional Scholar. The woman who once campaigned for the White House and feels compelled to weigh in on the Islamic State militants and Ukraine and the NSA because, who knows, she might run again someday. "I never believe in closing any doors," Palin declares when a subscriber asks about 2016. "I don't know what the future holds." This is who Palin's posse tells her she is — and who her fans want her to be.

And then there's the other Palin: the one Palin actually, you know, is. The one who isn't all that curious about world affairs. The one who's more interested in what's happening in Alaska than in the lower 48. The one who was propelled to political superstardom, before she was ready, by forces largely beyond her control. And the one who, deep down, in spite of all her bravado and bluster, still doesn't quite think she deserves all the attention.

The first Palin is the one the Sarah Palin Channel is designed to promote; the second Palin is the Palin who keeps peeking through, regardless.

When Palin tries to be the first Palin — especially in the early videos, before her handlers start scripting her remarks — she seems like a C student bluffing her way through an oral exam.

Here she is, for example, explaining why Billy Graham was such a pivotal figure in the history of American Christianity: "He could spread the world about" — wiggling a black Bible — "how important this is and how truuuuue this is. Simple message. And so, so passionate. He's great because he's passionate about what it is he does."

Here she is explaining how Obama has weakened America's standing in the world: "Now our enemies chide us, laugh at us, say they're going to come over and get us and kill our allies like Israel because we backtracked on that road that America had been known for and that was an appropriate superpower role that we had on the globe."

And here she is explaining how Congress should punish the president's misdeeds. "How do we send the message to Obama? We begin the process of impeachment, and once that message is sent that's a clear message to be received by his predecessors so that any future president will know that we're not going to put up with it.

In Palin's world, the 100th anniversary of World War I is called a "sentinel." Adolescence is described as a child's "formidable" years. After losing the 1960 presidential contest to John F. Kennedy, Richard Nixon chose to "run again in '67 and '72." And even a scripted video, such as Palin's Conservative Response to Elizabeth Warren's Progressive Commandments, can dissipate into some pretty surreal word salad the second that Palin decides to ad-lib.
"We believe that fast-food workers deserve a livable wage," Warren says in a news clip.

Cut to Palin. "We believe ... wait, I thought ... fast-food joints?" she replies, veering off-script. "Don't you guys think they're of the devil or somethin'? That's why, liberals, you want to send those evil employees who work at a fast-food joint that you don't believe in ... thought you wanted to, I don't know, send 'em to purgatory or somethin', so they all go vegan. And wages and picket lines ... I don't know, they're not often discussed in purgatory, are they? I don't know. Why are you even worried about fast-food wages?"

Simplistic (or even nonsensical) policy pronouncements are nothing new for Palin. But the surprising thing about the Sarah Palin Channel is that it's not live TV; her people could've edited the unflattering stuff out. That they didn't is borderline self-sabotage, politically speaking.

And yet from a personal perspective it actually makes for pretty revealing viewing. In video after video, Palin comes off as insecure and even vulnerable — the opposite of the tough Mama Grizzly image she strives in public to maintain. Ultimately, this is a much more compelling Sarah Palin — the exposed, uncertain Palin that Palin can't help but be.

Recalling her famous 2008 convention speech, she admits that's she's never reviewed the tape. "I don't want to watch myself," she says, lowering her eyes. "I'm as annoyed with my shrilly voice as you guys are, believe me."

Later, Palin describes what has changed in her life in the last six years. "At the time, I carried three cellphones: two for work and one for personal," she says. "Now I only carry one." A glimmer of sadness — a dim awareness, perhaps, of how far she's drifted from the center of the political universe — flashes across her face.

When Palin paraphrases Nixon's farewell address — "The haters are gonna hate," as she puts it — she quickly apologizes for botching the language. Nixon "said it much more articulately," Palin adds. "Much more gracefully. Graciously."

"My garden is kind of pathetic," Palin confesses at one point. "Which is par for the course."

Complimenting Joan Rivers for her outspoken support of Israel, Palin can't help but self-deprecate. "No doubt [Rivers] is appalled by my style," she mutters. "Or lack thereof."

Gazing wistfully at a framed White House photo with Todd, President George W. Bush, and first lady Laura Bush, Palin begins to fantasize. Her ambitions aren't particularly lofty. "Someday, we may be back there," she whispers — "having dinner with another president."

Palin chokes up when she finds a letter that her son Track sent her before he shipped off to Iraq. "I don't care what the 'politicos' say," she insists, bucking herself up, "because I'm the mother of a combat vet."

Palin starts to cry when an admirer writes about a special-needs school in Wisconsin that might be "a future prospect" for her other son, Trig, who was born with Down syndrome. "He still doesn't eat a lot of solid food," she admits, sounding momentarily defeated. "He's the only kid in the world who hasn't had a Cheerio yet."

And in my favorite video, "Mom-in-Chief," Palin tries to interest Trig in "One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish"; he slaps the book away and watches "SpongeBob" instead. Palin tries to convince her son to count and to identify the color of her fleece; he'd rather tap at his DVD player. This goes on for seven uneventful minutes: Palin tries to show us that she can mother the boy; Trig only occasionally responds.

No one can prove in a quick Web video that he or she is a good parent. But what's clear in the clip is that Palin really wants to prove it — just as any mom in her shoes would. I'm not cynical enough to scoff at that. In fact, I think it's pretty touching.


All politics is about acting, in a way: Every politician is playing a part. But the secret of Sarah Palin's appeal has never been the seamlessness of her public performances. The secret is that we could always see the seams; that we could always sense the person inside, struggling to fulfill the demands of a role she wasn't quite ready (or right) for. That's why certain voters identified so strongly with her even after she blew her big interviews with Katie Couric in 2008. "That would have happened to me, too," they told themselves. Or as one fan puts in on the Sarah Palin Channel, "She's all of us. She started out like anybody — and she turned herself into somebody."

And that's the strange magic of Palin's online video network. It's not that she has invented a new way to "shake it up and go around the mainstream media lapdogs," as she describes it, or even that we should now "expect to see future channels behind every major political figure (past, present and future) and major cause," which is media executive Howard Homonoff's take. The format works better for someone who's out of office than for someone who's aspiring to win office; I doubt that any rising stars will follow in Palin's footsteps. Still, it's a relief to see a former vice presidential candidate showing that she's as human as the rest of us (even when she thinks she's doing the opposite). Would I vote for Palin in a GOP primary? Probably not. But at least I know that she really exists — which is more than I can say for most politicians.

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