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Messages - Qubhed

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Spamalot / Re: describe ur dick w/ everquest terms
« on: October 08, 2016, 04:43:51 PM »
Knuckle Dusters

Spamalot / Re: Describe the last vagina yout saw
« on: October 06, 2016, 09:21:50 PM »

Spamalot / Re: Describe ur last fart using a movie title
« on: October 06, 2016, 05:10:25 PM »
PS: There Will Be Blood is the instant thread winner so let's get that one out of the way to get some longevity out of this thread. Also "Which movie title describes your sex life" is instantly won with "Three Men and a Baby" if any of you ever find yourselves playing that game in the future.

Spamalot / Re: Describe ur last fart using a movie title
« on: October 06, 2016, 04:41:26 PM »

General Discussion / Re: RIP Gene Wilder
« on: September 01, 2016, 12:55:57 AM »
I hear on the set of The Royal Tenenbaums he called Wes Anderson a cunt.

General Discussion / Re: Stunt dude unicycles on giant chimney
« on: August 31, 2016, 09:47:20 PM »
I feel like getting to the top of that chimney was probably more dangerous than what he did up there. Those walls were like four feet thick and completely wasted on the only form of transportation that I'm sure was invented solely as a joke. That man and his bandanna hat should feel nothing but shame for this accomplishment.

General Discussion / Re: Lightning bolt
« on: August 31, 2016, 07:16:44 PM »
Thought this thread would be about LARPers =(

Spamalot / Re: Got back from Aspen Saturday
« on: August 25, 2016, 09:43:43 PM »
There aren't minorities out there so maybe. Saw one black dude who was dressed like Colorado Carlton but that's it. We went to a little night club called Belly Up and saw some chick named Grace Potter dance around like an epileptic while singing boring songs we were unfamiliar with which just confirmed Aspen hadn't really fully discovered minorities yet. It was weird town, like some kind of rich, conservative Austin/Portland theme with an obsession over silver mining. Like ten random people talked to me about Aspen's history as a silver mining town and I have no idea why they cared so much or thought I would care. Also ended up leaving that concert and walking home but like a third of the way I felt a rumbling in the jungle and knew explosive diarrhea was coming but somehow by the grace of Innoruuk I managed to make it the like one and a half mile walk up hill without shitting my pants. If anybody ever asks me what my proudest accomplishment is I'm going to have to make something up.

Spamalot / Re: Got back from Aspen Saturday
« on: August 25, 2016, 05:25:58 PM »
Who hurt you?

Spamalot / Re: Got back from Aspen Saturday
« on: August 25, 2016, 02:41:18 AM »
1. Pic taken near Cyrodiil when we accidentally walked into an artist's painting and had to fight a troll
4. Aspen might as well just be Skyrim

Spamalot / Re: i got married
« on: August 23, 2016, 10:46:28 PM »
Grats Mr and Mrs Asauregg

Spamalot / Got back from Aspen Saturday
« on: August 23, 2016, 05:23:53 PM »
Crazy to see how the other side lives. I'll post pics once I get them from my gf. Stayed at her dad's place up there. As a fat guy: fuck mountains. Seriously.

Spamalot / Re: Hooked up my SNES
« on: August 23, 2016, 05:21:39 PM »
Best part about block fort was filling the bottom level with green shells bouncing around like crazy so if anybody fell in there they were doomed.

General Discussion / Re: Dfw folks
« on: August 08, 2016, 05:47:07 PM »
tucc is married?

Yeah dude.  1 year anniversary coming up soon.  Our families don't know that we're married though.  We will be holding our real "wedding" after she graduates next year.

Well they're going to get suspicious when you pick her up for prom, don't you think?

Spamalot / Re: 2010
« on: June 29, 2016, 06:52:33 PM »
I lost one of my apartment mailboxes this way. The only real piece of mail I had been receiving was a monthly Comcast bill whose price I could predict. One day I went to check it and it was empty with one of those "new tenant" forms inside. I was too embarrassed to fill out the same information again so I just went without mail for like six months. Ended up with like 200 dollars in credit to Comcast because I had been slightly overpaying.

I've worked in trucking going on like 16 years now and I don't know the first thing about driving a truck- including how to drive stick.

Spamalot / Re: TzT is actually dead?
« on: June 19, 2016, 11:38:33 AM »

Five guys, seven dolls, one cell phone belt clip.

General Discussion / Re: Game of Thrones S6 [Spoilers]
« on: June 16, 2016, 07:20:48 PM »
Cersei has to have something up her sleeve.  If this season rids us of her and Ramsey, who is going to be the new bad guy?  Someone has to step up, and I don't see Ramsey making it out this year.

Also, I am super annoyed with Tyrion this season.  He masterfully ran King's Landing, but he is making horrible choices with Mereen.  I can't imagine Dany is going to be happy with what he's done.  He effectively went against her wishes, brought in an unauthorized religion, and made a horrible assumption about the masters that ended up with him in a virtually indefensible position.  He just comes across as clueless.  It could be part of his arc... he gets Westoros, but not Essos, maybe? I dunno, but I am not enjoying it.

On the first point I'm thinking Euron will be our next big villain. I was reading a write up about how there's been three big villains representing different aspects of war or what have you. First was Tywin who was a very political evil, than Ramsey who was a very human evil and next will be Euron representing a supernatural evil.

On the second point I don't think he fucked up too badly. They didn't have the resources to mount attacks on the other two cities AND hold Mereen so they would have just dwindled what little they have until they were exhausted and finally defeated. Ask Sparta about that when they conquered Greece. After they were overthrown they were basically just a giant joke. This invasion was inevitable but he managed to buy Mereen some time to get its shit together and get the people united. That would help a great deal in a siege type position. However with Dany back and the Ironborn on the way I don't think its going to be a very long lived siege.

Little worried about Bastard Bowl. I think Jon will look crushed before the Knights of the Vale swoop in and save the day. Ramsay is being stupid meeting them in the field like Roose said which will give a huuuuge advantage to the armored calvary sweeping in and laying waste. Littlefinger will definitely use the situation to his advantage with his army stationed there and will basically force Sansa to be his puppet. Her machinations from that point forward are the wildcard.

General Discussion / Re: Game of Thrones S6 [Spoilers]
« on: June 13, 2016, 04:31:48 AM »
A little pet theory I've been sitting on for a while has become a little more possible. Its funny, if Cersei does indeed blow up King's Landing then its reasonable to believe that the ancient Targaryen stronghold, Dragonstone, might become the new capital of Westeros. Stannis constantly insisted that the only way for him to seize the throne was to always be taking action, however if he had just bided his time after the Blackwater and never went to the North then as the events unfolded he would not only be the only remaining heir but he would already being holding the new seat of power. Davos fucked his shit up =/ Hell if he never even rebelled at all he might have become king if something else killed Renly.

« on: June 12, 2016, 07:37:11 PM »
Shouldn't it be "Never say never except when you're clarifying when to say never"?

Agrul fighting the good fight of being reasonable on an unreasonable internet.

Spamalot / Re: My Girlfriend
« on: June 06, 2016, 06:30:12 PM »
Matchstick Men is a great Nic Cage flick. Maybe because I'm a sucker for stories about conmen but I really enjoyed it.

Spamalot / Re: Gen X movies
« on: May 13, 2016, 12:20:53 AM »
Tarantino characters can be kind of boring sometimes but one of my all time favorite characters is Budd from Kill Bill 2. He comes off as this redneck simpleton but there's so much depth to his character that they only hint at. First of all he strikes me as a man living in penance for his sins. And not just because of his dialogue with Bill. He's one of the best trained assassins in the world and yet he lives in a shithole trailer in the middle of the El Paso desert (the same city where they attacked the Bride mind you) He works an incredibly humiliating job for a douchebag and his condescending staff. If he wanted to he could butcher every single person working there, torch the place and march off into the sunset never to be seen again, but he doesn't. Instead he seems to go out of his way to antagonize his employer in such a cavalier way and get himself some free time after knowing the Bride was after him. He likely wants to die. Maybe that's why he stays in El Paso. Hoping that one day she'll wake up and he'll be the first person she kills. But she doesn't. When he realizes that she's finally come for him he sets up in his chair and is the only single member of the Assassin Squad to actually down the Bride. But then he does something interesting. Instead of killing her outright he puts her in his cowboy boots (a boot mind you he HAD to have known had a knife in it) and buries her alive with a flashlight. Now he must have gone through the same training under Pai Mei as the others. He probably punched those same wooden boards thousands upon thousands of times. He had to have known that if she was strong enough she could escape her fate. And she was the strongest of them. He was stalling. What does he do then? Well he offers to sell her Hanzai sword to Elle. He even tells her where the Bride is buried, exact tombstone and everything. All part of his master plan. He obviously doesn't need the money. If he did he wouldn't maintain the awful lifestyle he was in in the first place. No, I posit that instead he was wanting to lure Elle out. He knew that unlike the others she would hide from the Bride for as long as she could and possibly find a way to ambush her instead. He knew Elle was going to kill him. THe look of amused surprise on his face when he opens the suitcase and it actually has cash in it is very telling. But he had safeguards. In every possible scenario he would get the justice he felt needed to be served. He probably knew she would try to take credit for the Bride's murder (and she did) and he probably knew that Bill would have exhumed the body for confirmation. Once he found Budd's boots on the bride he would know that Elle was lying about her and Budd's death and kill Elle. Or he could stall Elle until the Bride frees herself and kills Elle herself. Worst case scenario she buys the sword with no funny business and he walks away with a million dollars. Worst case scenario.

Spamalot / Re: My Girlfriend Pt. 2
« on: May 12, 2016, 11:56:49 PM »
attempt to convince people u have a girlfriend

Totally do! And she does sex to me like all the time. Here's a picture we took today:

Spamalot / Re: Gen X movies
« on: May 12, 2016, 07:43:32 PM »
Oh my god thank you. I remember being a kid and thinking "this will never look as foreign to me as shit from the 70's does" but here we are. Hell even that 2000ish era fashion looks really strange only a decade later.

I had a friend who was obsessed with Fight Club and missed the meaning by more than a mile. Even searched for and purchased Brad Pitt's super expensive wardrobe in the film. I remember the Halloween after the Dark Knight came out he was so moody and broody because he spent all this time and money on a Joker costume only to be somehow surprised to see like a million other people with the same costume, most of which spent a fraction of the time on it. THat's why I always like to go dressed as a recently dead celebrity- you're likely not going to see somebody in the same costume and if you do- bam, lifelong friend.

Spamalot / Gen X movies
« on: May 12, 2016, 06:55:55 PM »
Really have not aged well. Saw the trailer for Trainspotting again. That whole monologue, "Choose a car, choose a job with insurance benefits, choose a nice apartment and a big screen TV" Its like you should be so lucky you little shit. So many movies from that era are some whiny little middle class white guy bitching that his life is too good but he wants to "follow his dreams" Like fuck your dreams man, I'm barely keeping my head above water.

Its a thing I kind of like/dislike about Fight Club. Its almost genius how people misunderstand that movie at all these different layers. At the most shallow layer were the guys who launched their own "Fight Clubs" because they thought a bunch of dudes beating the shit out of each other in an unregulated environment with no professionals on hand was a good idea. Then you had the Gen X psuedointellectuals who shaved their heads and rebelled against consumerism, mimicking the directionless cult followers they didn't even realize we're mocked by the movie itself. THen you just have cynical assholes like myself who talk about the other two groups with a smug sense of superiority that take themselves too seriously but are just as easily mockable and lack the self awareness and balls to really dig into themselves. Bunch of dicks, the whole lot of us.

Spamalot / My Girlfriend Pt. 2
« on: May 12, 2016, 02:52:43 AM »
You only clicked for pics, didn't you? I spent like an hour on that stupid NFL post and it got like a third of the views as the thread titled "My Girlfriend"

You guys should be ashamed of yourselves.

Spamalot / Re: My Girlfriend
« on: May 12, 2016, 02:18:14 AM »
32, like me. Also Knitting I sent that picture of her to you in confidence and it really disappoints me that you would so flippantly post it like this.

Spamalot / Re: Excuse me is this the posting forum?
« on: May 11, 2016, 11:54:29 PM »
Oh I'm so sorry, it is, but its the never stop posting forum

Spamalot / My Girlfriend
« on: May 11, 2016, 02:54:37 AM »
When I asked her what I should choose as my second topic she responded with something about somebody named Blac Chyna and her new baby with one Rob Kardashian so for this thread I would like thoughtfully stroke my neckbeard and make our topic: Girls: Why do they like such awful things? She likes me as well but that's not really helping her case much.

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